Premarital Sex…Before and After Pt.2

We started discussing this subject with asking “Is Premarital Sex Okay?“. We then moved on to how people can stay away from engaging in premarital sex in “Premarital Sex…Before and After Pt. 1“. This article will discuss the aftermath of premarital sex (PS) and how we can heal from the devastation.

Premarital sex is rampant in our culture. People are getting married at an older age. For those who do not have a Biblical Worldview sex can be taken seriously or casually. We don’t need to look hard to see this displayed for us…Thanks Jersey Shore! No matter how casually one takes premarital sex, it still causes massive devastation. It can be like a personal Katrina. Every part of your being can be effected by it. Physically, it can cause STD’s, pregnancy, and stress. Emotionally, it can cause pain, guilt, and hopelessness. Spiritually, it can cause a feeling of “untouchableness”. The last one is the most devastating. This “untouchableness” is the feeling that God cannot save someone so wretched and gross. How can we move past this feeling? That is the goal of this post.

1) Recognize Your Sin

As I pointed out in my first article, “Is Premarital Sex Okay?”, PS is sin. It is something that God considers evil. When we engage in such behavior we are telling God, “My self-gratification is more important than your glorification.” When we come to this understanding it can put us in a place of guilt and shame. Many would say that those are negative feelings but when it comes to sinning against a holy God those are proper reactions. If there is no guilt then how could anyone be condemned? Of course, sin is a damnable offense to God. As the Apostle Paul writes:

For the payoff of sin is death -Romans 6:23a, NET

When we sin we deserve death. For the believer this should cause a deep sense of guilt and shame. This leads us into the second step of dealing with sexual sin…repentance.

2) Repent

Repentance is essential to restoring a vibrant life after the devastation of sexual sin. God is faithful to his children even when his children are not. When Paul writes his second letter to the Corinthians he is very worried about their lack of concern over sexual immorality. Corinth was a place that was filled with sexual sin. We live in similar times. The only difference is that we don’t need to go anywhere to see it. We have access to sex everyday when we turn the TV on. While TV wasn’t a concern for Paul, the cultural view of sex was. Paul says this in 2 Corinthians 12:21:

I am afraid that when I come again, my God may humiliate me before you, and I will grieve for many of those who previously sinned and have not repented of the impurity, sexual immorality, and licentiousness that they have practiced. -NET

Paul is afraid that people within the Christian community haven’t repented from their sin. He knows the power of repentance. Repentance is more than being sorry or offering an apology. It is turning from the sin one has committed and living a life that is pleasing to God. Repentance is what leads us to freedom. Freedom brings new life.

3) Live in Freedom

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Imagine with me standing before a jury. You are on trial for committing a heinous crime. Now imagine being convicted and locked up. While in prison you realize that you were wrong and you are sorry for what you have done. You have had a change of heart and decided to turn from your old ways. Someone within the justice system stands in your defense to account for the change of heart you have shown and you are set free after a year behind bars. How do you feel?

I am sure I would feel disconnected, forgotten, maybe even, lost in a world that has undergone a variety of changes since I was put away. But, I know one feeling that would be overwhelming. The feeling of freedom.

That sense of freedom is similar to the calming assurance I have in Christ. I know that I am his and he is mine. That means that when it is all said and done I am going to be with him forever. What that doesn’t mean is that I am going to live a completely sin-free life. I am going to make mistakes because the flesh is weak but God is faithful. He has made his people free in Christ as Paul tells us in Galatians 5 when he writes:

For freedom Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not be subject again to the yoke of slavery. -Gal. 5:1, NET

For those that have faith in Christ you are free because of Christ’s work on the cross. Live in that freedom and in confidence knowing that your just condemnation has been overturned and accounted for. As Paul writes in Romans 8:1:

There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. -NET

You were once condemned, and justly so, but now you stand in Christ! Every Christian needs to be reminded of this truth and live within it.

For those that have made mistakes with premarital sex or other sexual sins, remember that even though you are in the midst of devastation, God is faithful. Though you may be suffering from guilt and shame, God is comforting. You may have thought that your sin made you “untouchable”, but God is powerful enough to change you. God changes, saves, and sanctifies people! I pray he will do the same for you.

Thanks for reading.


About Travis Berry

I am a blatantly honest person who loves to think, read, discuss, and write about God and theology. I have a bachelor's degree in Youth Ministry from Crown College. I work at a church in Houston, TX as a Youth Director and love every minute of it! I am married to a wonderful woman named Becky and we have one amazing child! I have a love for God's Word, and a fervor to live it out in the fullest, and I pray this blog reflects that. Thanks for checking out AnotherChristianBlog!.

Posted on January 12, 2012, in Christianity, Culture, Life, Theology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

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